Of late I have seen many friends, who happened to be females, get engaged or in the process of getting engaged pretty soon. All have many things in common. They are independent and like it to remain that way. They are educated and earn for themselves. They have friends, both men and women. All these things they all want to let it remain that way, but unfortunately they are women.
Women need to change families after marriage. Embrace completely new family and are supposed to do it their way. So, there is no guarantee that the above things they love, will remain that way. There are hell lot of unknowns involved. Obviously, so, I have seen them develop cold feet about this whole arranged marriage thing. How on earth will somebody be able to tell if the prospective other half, who in this case is a male and the dominant factor in the whole equation, will be the just right person for the prospective bride, in just an hour of meeting with all the elders hovering around! I need few months just to make the right kind of friends! This is a lot of pressure. This causes a lot of anxiety. I have seen anxieties like – what if I have to give up my job or what if I have to let go of my friends, etc. The anxiety is also on the part of the friends, who may end up loosing contact with a good friend in the process.
This is all too thorny picture. The good thing is that somehow people end up knowing that the other person is just the right one. Hope this proves to be true for everyone. All the best.
PS. This is a girls perspective. I somehow can’t imagine a guy’s perspective about arranged marriage. I guess from a guy’s perspective the only three unknowns they need to look for are – that the girl is pretty, good natured and has good family background.
3 replies on “It’s all Arranged”
Its the indian way of life its been life this forever always compromise… then why should marriage be any different… arranged marriages are difficult even on guys… not only gals… both have to adjust and make it work out… and i think its this arranging of marriages y which there are so less divorces.. arranged rarely see divorces cause both adjust for the family pride and the bride and the groom's families are behind them always to make it work.. when marriages work there is no pressure on kids so the live up.. unlike western countries.. where the kids feel the most pressure of separated parents….
BTW who got engaged??
Hey.. never thought guys will be so thoughtful about girls’ point of view. see what happens if you are surrounded with girls all the time.. u start thinking like them.. 😛 😛 😛
Good for you that you moved outta Kol. 😉
Ya this is called induction. 😛